April 13, 2009

  • [protected with Friends Lock]

    Just kidding.  I wouldn't go Friends Locked on you.

    Friends Lock is one of those things that's great when you use it... but you kinda wish nobody else did.  It's like Caller ID... it's great when you can screen your own calls.  But it's no fun to have your calls screened!

    The Xanga equivalent: it's mildly irritating when you see a username in your footprints and you go to click on it... and the site is Friends Locked.

    Then again, if you're having trouble with someone bothering you... you kinda have to use Caller ID or Friends Lock.  So there's that.  I saw a CSI:NY recently where a woman was being stalked, and she turned to extreme measure to get her life back.  The internet can be a scary place, which is why we built privacy features like this.

    Have you ever had to use Friends Lock?  How did it work for you?

Comments (87)

  • I've never used it

  • I've never used Friends Lock and don't plan on it. The only slightly annoying thing about Friends Lock is when mulitple people recommend a post on Friends Lock. Do you think the rec feature should still be available when they post it on Friends Lock?

    Or am I getting Private/Protected posts mixed up? Now I'm just all confused.

  • Yes , when ppl decided toEX me to be rude it stopped them. It worked but I couldn't tell were friends request ppl came from.

  • I've never used it, and neither have any of the people I sub to, but it's slightly irritating when people I sub to rec a friends locked post. What's the point?

  • Haha good one.  I got confused when I saw the title in my inbox.  I haven't yet used friends lock and I hope I won't feel the need to anytime soon.

  • I haven't used it, but I think it's a great feature.

  • For a long time I thought [Protected with Friends Lock] was the title of the post when people rec'd them. I turned off my friends lock a long time ago so that I was able to be featured if so chosen to be. It is annoying to have a million people rec a friends locked post and not be able to see it.

  • I used Friends Lock on my old site; I didn't really want hordes of strangers reading my writing.  It was much more personal then, and I wasn't comfortable with it.  It was too similar to having a stranger read my diary.  Now, I write about mostly different things.  When I did use it, though, it worked wonderfully.

  • Friend lock is for little girls that are afraid of their shadow.

  • no - I'll never pit my main xanga on friends lock.
    if I had to, I'd get another xanga and only invite the ones I trust abd have that on friends lock-

  • I put my site on Friends Lock for awhile a few months ago. I noticed I got a lot of friend requests from people who had subbed me but not added me as a friend. 

  • I haven't used it, but I did have a problem with somebody stalking me on another site (not here on Xanga), so having recourse options when it happens is a good thing.

    I hate it too when people recommend a friends lock post. It makes me feel I'm missing out. But that's really no big deal.

  • I've gone on Friend Lock once. Just needed a bit of privacy from a certain person.

    It's funny because I submitted an Idea regarding this. Don't know if you or anyone else on the Xanga team has seen the Idea, but if you haven't, here it is:

    http://www.xanga.com/ideas/930/friendlockworkingbothways.html

  • everyone is all sorts of angry..

  • Incidentally, this reminded me that I had a suggestion to make locked accounts completely invisible.  It would eliminate the annoying phenomenon of locked recs and give them even better privacy. Win-win if you ask me.

  • I've never needed to use friends lock because I post stuff that most people don't really care about anyway. But I do find it irritating at best to have my universal inbox FLOODED (and I mean that) with recs to friends locked sites.  It makes me want to go "clean out" my friend list  so I don't get so much stuff I can't see or use anyway. 

  • I have never used friend lock and never would...I know people who read my blog via RSS. If I would friend lock then they couldn't read.

  • it sucks when friendslocked people do that.. they're free to explore but you can't view their things or they won't accept your friend request.

    ugh. can you guys make a "people with friends lock block" so I can block people that are on friends lock and aren't my friend?

    No I know, that's pretty stupid and selfish of me.. hahaha

    ps, great title!

  • @wherethefishlives - no, you're not getting confused, you've got it right. I hate when people recommend posts from people who have friends lock, its so annoying!!

  • I've used it; its highly effective for keeping stalkers out. But now that the stalkers have cooled their jets I don't feel the need to have it anymore. =]

  • I keep it on most of the time, for multiple reasons not the least of which being I've had a stalker.

  • If I have something to say, I say it. It doesn't matter who sees it. When people start acting stupid, they get blocked. I hide them, I don't hide myself.

  • if you're going to put personal information on the net, friends lock wont help

  • you know what would be cool.. having the option to post friends locked or subbed lock or viewable to everyone without having to block off the unsubbed..

    LiKE.. having your site be viewable to everyone but certain posts can be protected, protected with sub lock, or friends locked.. even in the subscription page.

    i don't know if that makes sense.. i'm just rambling. haha

  • i've got friends lock... and i accept zero invites. hard to get at its best.

  • I don't care for friend's lock. 

    I have been harassed on xanga.  Should that person/persons resume their craziness, I would much prefer a means of blocking IP's than having to hide behind friends lock. 

  • i got cockblocked...

  • You already know how I feel about it.

  • It is very annoying when Friends locked posts show up as recommended. It's also more than annoying when somebody who is friends locked can visit you, crawl all over your site, read everything posted, but you can't see what they have on that site, not even a profile, and they can do so repeatedly, unless you block them one at a time. A block to block those people as a group would probably be nice for some users. Having those issues straightened out would be much appreciated.

    I've never used Friends Lock. To me, that is 'bloggers jail' that punishes the one posting, not the ones creating the problems that the Friend's Lock is supposed to be solving. As the first page of comments also shows, many have no idea why these things might truly be needed, it's far from 'being afraid of one's shadow' and it is not because of rampant paranoia either. Many of us have solid reasons for why our sites are locked or blocked. But it's not the best answer, in my opinion it's a form of punishment for many of us who have done nothing wrong, yet are not able to use this site freely because of others, who act with warped agendas.

  • I haven't used friends lock or Xanga sign in.  I hope I don't have to.  So far, I haven't had any negative experience here at Xanga.  It's been pretty good actually.  A lot of my subscribers all comment about the feeling of community (well - our little neighborhood). 

  • I'll tell you what's annoying: someone subscribes to you, doesn't friend you, and their site is friend's locked. That gets annoying. Srsly.

    Or, the EX rated sites that subscribe. Weird.

  • Never used it.

    Overuse depends on whether you're here for the social aspect or simply trying to get somebody to please read my blog.

  • I have used friends lock in the past and it did work well...but...(there's always a but)... decided against using it so that I could allow some family and friends who are nto xangans to view my blog.

    The reason I had used friends lock was because I was concerned that I had picked up a "cyber-stalker" from a dating site I was on before I got married.  The weird thing with the "cyber-stalker" is that this person still continues to peruse my blog without saying a word and I've been married for almost two years now!  It still really creeps me out especially when the go staight for the pics of me.

    Rather than protect or friends lock, I've chosen to just be careful about my content.  I don't post things which I'm nto ok wih the general public knowing.

  • I've had the good fortune to not really run into any reason where I would have to use Friends Lock!

  • i hateee friends lock. :( haha

  • I used friend's lock as a front gate. not everyone is welcome to my xanga world, especially people who don't exhibit self-respect, self-control or courtesy.

    it's been off lately but when the neighborhood gets rough, up go the window bars and on goes the padlock.

    more datingish garbage on the front page? there goes the neighborhood....

    the xanga 'hood oscillates between ghetto and classy...

  • I've never used it and don't plan to.  Anyone who requests to be my friend can be, so it would be pretty pointless.  I only remove friends to those who go crazy on the mass messages.  And I use the "old Xanga" so that I don't have to see what all my "friends" have written or recommended.

    Plus, how would I filter who could see it?  I don't have that kind of time to decide who can read it...and really, I'm not sure anyone wants to read my blog that bad, especially since it's pretty empty these days. :P

  • I mainly used friends lock to keep colleges out of my stuff when I was trying to be accepted. Call it paranoia, but my counselors always told me they looked into things like Myspace, Facebook, and Xanga. Seemed like a pretty nifty tool to keep friends in and everyone else out. It always let me know who cared enough to friend me and read my subscription.

  • yes. it works wonders in pissing people off. just exactly the way i like it. =)

  • I don't like friends lock,  but I did use it recently when my ex's current girlfriend decided to read my blog and comment. what I write is for everyone, but someone who is malicious or curious about me for jerky reasons - they don't get access to my blog. I figured if i blocked and then friends locked it, she'd get the hint and go away. friends lock lasted a week and I doubt i'll do it again.

  • I have only had to put it on once or twice because of job interviews I have had.

  • I have some Xanga friends who enabled friends lock on their pregger blogs for privacy reasons and it's totally understandable.

    But it is extremely annoying when someone who is friends locked wants me to read that blog and yet does not initiate the friending process. They comment "Hey, check out my new pregger blog here", I click over, it's friend-locked, there's no friend invite from them... So they want me to initiate the friending process to check out a site I'm hardly even interested in that they're trying to promote...? Um, no. I know it's not a big deal, but it really annoys me when people are presumptuous that I'm interested in reading what they have to say. Sorry.

  • We need national standardized ID system to be implemented on internet, like in south corea.

  • Never used it. because i dont know what it is.

  • Never used it. because i dont know what it is.

  • I have my site on Friends Lock. I'm generally a private person & sometimes I just want to vent, & most of the time its just to people I know or who could help me with a problem, I don't need everyone reading it. I could use Protected Posts, but that's a bigger pain in the rear-end, its just easier for me to use Friends Lock. I know a lot of people on Friends Lock.

  • i have never been stalked and i don't see why anyone would want to. i also think that people who claim people are stalking them are usually full of their own lovely bull.

    i did have xanga lock once upon a time. now THAT was useful.

  • I've never used it, and don't really plan on it. I guess I don't see the point, unless you're getting horribly harassed or something.

  • i turned on xanga lock. I decided it's time that people sign up to xanga if they like my writing enough. i don't have friends lock though.

  • I dont have that many friends so nobody would read my stuffs if I use friends lock...

  • I don't use it. I probably would though if my Xanga were more like a diary, but it's not.

  • I have used it. But I prefer not to.
    I hope you are doing well and having a great day.
    Tina

  • I just wish recs for friends-locked sites that you aren't friends with wouldn't show up in your inbox.

  • I remembered that you got embarrassed that you recommended a post where it was friend locked. It is such a closed world we have sometimes but it is there for the protection of a lot of nice people against a lot of wicked people in this world.

  • HAH!! Never had to use a friends lock... ever. Got locked out in other ways but that's another story! Drop by and be a part of American hisory! It'll explain itself!

    Your Dr. Ebola!

  • If someone sends an invite, their FL should be dropped; like on Facebook.

    RYC: He was in a couple of other things; namely the even crappier sequel to the Live-Action Inspector Gadget movie.

  • Anonymosity = friends lock! 

  • i have yet to have any hot Xangan girls stalking me just yet...

    so no need for any lock for the moment...
    =)

  • I have because I wrote something very personal and didn't want to share it with everyone.

  • You are not allowed to use friends lock lol

  • I used friend's lock for a while on my other site.  I used it because I had some people hunting me down so they could read my blogs then tell everyone in my town how 'crazy' I was.  I took it off though because I don't want to feel like I have to hide from anyone.  If they don't like what I'm saying, they can stay off my site.

  • I have not and will not use it. I don't need it. I have no trouble getting in anyone's face to accomplish something necessary, but only do that when really necessary. It is usually as part of my job. So, if I have an issue online, I can fix it myself, and have done so on occasion. I think it is valuable though for young people and females that need to protect themselves from one or more people.

  • I dislike friends lock because people can creep your site and you can't even see their profile.  I can understand some people wanting to hide totally from family, exes, etc, but I would argue that's what protected posting is for. 

  • I've had to turn off anonymous commenting, but never anything as serious as friends lock.  If it's that private, write in Word.  I do wish, however, there were 'moderator approval' like at blogspot.  Sometimes some REALLY nasty comments sit on my site for a while before I get back to delete them, and that's kind of not kewl.

    Can I ask you a favor?  Could you visit my site and tell me if you see it?   anna.xanga.com.  Everyone is Facebooking me telling me it's blank, and I can't see it, either.  I edited my skin yesterday, but everything was fine until 2pm this afternoon, apparently.  Is something changed in skins?  I can't even remove the skin - it says 'error, contact administrator'.

    I need help.  Thank you.

  • I prefer when people use xanga lock (or whatever it's called when you have to be logged in), that way you kind of know who's coming, sort of, a little).  I assume that most people who comment on my site and then have friends lock would let me be their friend if I asked, although sometimes you might want to check them out first (you could always unfriend them, right?  I'm not as particular about who is my friend as I am about who I subscribe to anyway).  I'm annoyed more by this on Facebook, where I'm looking for someone, I'm not sure if its them, and I can't even see a bigger profile picture before I have to request to be their friend.  They, of course, won't want to ask me, "do I know you?" cause they'd be embarrassed if they should have, and... anyway.

    John - I don't know where to report bugs anymore.  I can't seem to find a place, but for the last few days I've been trying to create a plug and I get to a "xanga doesn't recognize the page" page.  I ended up using an old generic plug I had already created, but I just wanted to report this.  Hope all is well.

  • Friends lock definitely comes in handy. I love the feature :D

    Oh and I just came across this random blog-- some random person trying to cause trouble it sounds like? I'm not really sure what their intentions are. You may want to consider shutting it down though.  Just giving a heads up-- http://thisismydls.xanga.com/

  • Lol, good one. I haven't used friend's lock yet, but it's comforting to know that the option is there. Just in case :)

  • With all the locks/blocking/protected lists you guys offer, I find Xanga to be the safest site around! I don't know how some people can say that Xanga needs more privacy features (blocking IP addresses, for example). Ah well. Based on how many votes that idea got, I think I'm in the minority for some reason.

    Speaking of ideas...I think Xanga should add calendars to pulse pages, or at least let us scroll through pulses by date. It's already got 112 votes and only 6 votes against, so I think it would be popular. I also think it would be less intrusive and less complicated than some of the other top ideas (blocking IP addresses).  

    Pete

  • Nope. But that is annoying, especially when they track footprints all over the blog, and their damn lock keeps you from returning that in kind. 

  • i personally havnt had to use it. i can see someone having to use it. not quite the answer you were looking for. sorry. 

    its been a long time but im back writing... jj

    jester

  • Nice reference to CSI: NY ;)  

  • I never put on Friends lock, but enabled Sign-in lock once when I thought my boss discovered my xanga.  False alarm, I think.  I believe that all blogs should be open to the public.  So no Sign-in lock for me either.

  • No, before friends lock I had to keep changing my Username. The problem got solved. I would use Protective Posting before Friends Lock. I think Friends Lock is a last resort.

    BTW, thanks for the comment. I was frustrated & in whine and grump mode. Thanks for "listening".

  • I hate Friends lock ....

  • I had to use it once, but then my stalkers wouldn't go away even after a couple of years and so I gave up. Pulled the locks off and went public because honestly, just who is worth that much trouble anyway? [sigh, rolls eyes thinking about said stalkers] That being said, I've never liked when someone subs to my Xanga and then has Friends Lock so I can't even read their weblog or know anything about them. Pfft-!

  • I used to use friends lock before. I don't anymore. I used it to keep my life and thoughts private from people I knew irl. I don't care anymore so it is not friends only. I do however still use the sign in lock, so I can keep track with footprints. Just in case someone stumbles onto my site I know irl I can block them.

  • Oh dude, I'm so glad you recommended that footprints entry. I was going to write a long ass post about this ages ago but never got around to it. Just in case you don't see my comment there, I definitely browse less, not because of footprints but because of
    footprints lock. Every other link I try to go to ends up blocking me
    because some paranoid idiot has footprints lock on. When you think
    about it, footprints lock breaks the usability of xanga. Anyone
    paranoid enough to have footprints lock on should have their own little
    paranoid xanga community, and any and all links to someone with
    footprints lock shouldn't show up on any page I'm browsing. I wish you
    had a footprints lock lock where I could lock out people who have
    footprints lock on. 

  • No, and to be honest, I would never block anyone from my site either. I'd rather give people the opportunity to direct thier problems to me directly than to block them and have them go to thier site saying, "OMFGBBQ!!!!1 Allison blok3d me! That bitch! She jus gellous cuz im ryte.Stupid wh0re."

  • PLEASE HELP!! I CAN NOT SEND MESSAGES THROUGH XANGA!! AND THERE IS NO OTHER WAY TO REACH YOU GUYS!!

  • Actually, John, I've never used it.  What's the point of writing on a blog if it's not available for people to read?  Might as well use MS Word or something.  Write an e-mail to your friends.  That's not what blogging is about... at least IMHO.

    HOWEVER, having said, there are times (like, say, oh, TODAY) that I really wish Xanga offered weblog moderation, like... is it Blogspot?  Where you comment, and it says, "Your comment is awaiting moderation"... so that if someone wicked this way comes, you can delete the comment before everyone else can see the vile things that were said... instead of showing up to find it's been there for three hours and deleting it AFTER the damage is done.  One bad apple shouldn't ruin the whole bushel... not if Xanga allowed us to pick the rotten ones out for the sake of the good ones.

    Might you consider such a thing?  I'd hate to disable anonymous comments because there are three nasty ladies with little else to do than make others miserable... but without moderator abilities, I'm not sure what else to do, except make everyone pay for the bad behavior of a few.

  • I just mostly do protected. 

  • Dont think ive ever used friends lock and hope i never will have a need to. As someone said a few posts above me, "If I have something to say, I say it. It
    doesn't matter who sees it" 

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